Wednesday, September 19, 2012
Week 5 Reading Review #1
When it comes to stopping a conflict I feel it is not too difficult for me. Obviously the magnitude of the conflict determines the level of difficulty but in the end I do not find stopping a conflict to be an impossible task. I give credit for this because I feel that I instinctively have been using the "stop-think-listen-communicate" method. I am happy that now I can put a name to how I handle conflicts. Looking back to how I have dealt with conflicts before I find those that ended out bad were those were I just jumped in or spoke out of emotion and did not not use the method at all. If I could give any advice I would say do not instantly approach a conflict based off your emotion and instead address why you are feeling that specific emotion and then evaluate the situation. That process can be done quickly but as long as you cover all grounds or better put as "stop-think-listen-communicate". Personally my "time-out" is not a typical time out where I leave the room or speak to someone the next day. I find my time out to be in mid conversation especially when asked a question or when someone is expecting a response. I like to stop and think about what I am going to say, better put I am gathering my thoughts in this time out and deciding what is the best way to respond. That allows me to also catch myself before I say something wrong that could make the conflict worse.
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After reading your post, I really reflected to my life and can relate to you. During times of conflict it is really easy to get caught up on what the problem and not the bigger picture. Is the fight really worth it? That’s a question that needs to be answered before the conflict escalates too far. Most of the time it is not worth it and walking away from the situation or talking is out is the best method. Taking a “time-out” during the conflict can also be a great way of avoiding the problem and actually understanding why you are in the conflict in the first place. Overall, good post and I related to you for many different reasons.
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ReplyDeleteFirst of all, you did a great job on your post! I really liked the advice that you gave about trying not to instantly approach conflict right away because of the strong emotions that you might be feeling. I feel that this is the most important advice anyone can give. I also agree on using the stop, think, listen, and communicate method. This is also the method that I used in my post. I think that people used this approach there would be less conflict and more restored relationships. Overall, you did a great job. Keep up the good work!
Great post. I would agree with you that it is not to difficult for me to stop conflict. I find more often than not, I am the one to stop things and to just step back and think about what just happened. I do think that have used the S-TLC system in the past. I never knew until reading the chapter that there were specific steps that should be taken. For me, my “time out” is just stepping back to walk away and thinking about what happened. It allows me to not see the “conflict” and to have a clear mind when thinking. I enjoyed reading your post.
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