Week 9 Reading Review #2

When it comes to my anger I do my best at expressing it calmly. I hardly blow up with aggression because I find that to be useless. When you blow up I feel people are more focused on how you acted then the actual subject you are blowing up about.  I will admit though that if my anger builds up over time then there is a possibility I will express it with what people may see as “blowing up” but that is not a normal action for me. I try to express my anger in a very calm manner because to me it is very affective. It keeps both parties focused and allows for both parties to clearly hear what the other person has to say. Just because it is expressed calmly does not mean that there is no arguing going on. I find that handling anger in this way makes people think dealing with me is easy but I can promise that does not mean I am somebody that is easily manipulated.

Week 9 Reading Review #1

Many people would divide life into two categories which would be "work" and "leisure".  More often than not people would rather have leisure than work. Some though do claim to have complete leisure and that is because of a certain way they approach their life. In chapter 7 it talk about the importance of making a distinction between work and play, understanding what play is exactly and integration. I plan to approach my work and school commitments in a way that compliments the three solutions in chapter 7. Making a distinction between what I find work and play to be in my life is key because then I can plan my week accordingly. I will know when to be excited and looking forward to play time and then I also would not be blindsided by work. Although before I do that I need to first understand exactly what "play" is. Play is not defined by the actually experiences but it is defined by how it effects the people making those acts. If I find running up and down a flight of stairs to be fun then that is my play where as someone else may find that to be work. Once I establish what my play and work is then I could sort out the activities I do in my everyday life. Lastly is something that is not as simple as the rest but it can help. It is a tool that I feel is used by those who seem to have more play than the average person. These people use integration and by that I mean they take what they may at first seem to be play but then turn it into something that brings them joy and consequently that turns their once work into play. I plan to establish my work and play then plan out my weeks. After this I will begin my journey to having as much play as possible by looking at the joy things bring me and making that my main focus. Over time I feel this will help me succeed and live a stress free life.

Week 7 Reading Review #3

From this week’s reading I have taken the concept of trust to be the most interesting. I Say this because trust is not exactly black or white. Trust has its own levels and you can never be too sure about anything. One moment you give someone all your trust and the next moment that trust has been broken. I feel depending on the level of your communicative relationship with someone determines the level of trust you have with another person. I feel that once trust is broken by one person who you gave the highest level of trust then for some time it is hard for you to give that level of trust to anyone. Trust is a sensitive thing that I feel goes over looked not by those giving trust but by those trying to gain trust.  I have lost trust in someone I thought I could trust many things with. What I found weird was how little they cared and how they did not seem to put any effort in trying to gain my trust back. They still wanted to remain good friends and act as if everything was fine and nothing happened. I feel this person overlooked the issue of trust and slowly it ruined our relationship.

Week 7 Reading Review #2

I feel an unbalanced power relationship has its effects on people but it depends on the type of relationship. In a parent to child relationship there should be more power on the parent side. I am not a parent but I feel the parent should not feel like a warden but more of knowing that they have a responsibility of keeping their child safe. The children who are in less power should never feel abused, that is of course unless they really are being abused. Children should feel a sense of respect towards their parents for everything they do for them. In a relationship such as a boyfriend girlfriend or marriage things are different. If one person has more power than the other I feel that is unhealthy and can cause many problems down the road. There are chances that one person may be correct and the other wrong but they both should know that there is a mutual respect and they should come to terms with what is best for them both. Having more power in this type of relationship can cause “power trips”.  Those in less of power can either feel helpless or sometimes trapped. People should have equal power levels in a relationship with a partner. Other times, such as parenthood, more power should be given to one side. In the end if the power is distributed correctly in the correct situation people should feel satisfied.

Week 7 Reading Review #1

I have lost trust in someone before. It was a very weird time because at that point I felt I could have given them full trust. When I was lied to I was more shocked. I told my friend a secret that I didn’t want anyone else to know. I “knew” I could trust him but I still said “keep it to yourself”. Other people were then talking to me about this secret and I knew it was my friend because he was the only one I told. I was in shock and disbelief. How could someone I gave trust in go behind my back? I did not even confront my friend about what he had done but what I did was not tell him much of anything anymore. He was my friend but he was not close enough to where I wanted to have trust in him anymore. My trust was never fully restored in him but what it has done is made me more aware of who I want to put my trust in. My trust has been “restored” in the new people in my life.

Week 5 Reading Review #3

One of the concepts that I found the most interesting to me was the entire concept of listening. Listening to me is the most important concept when it comes to conflict resolution. Without listening there is no way of applying a proper response or speaking such a way that works well with those involved in the conflict. Not listening is basically like walking across the freeway with your eyes closed. You may make it across the freeway but you most likely won’t. Stop think listen communicate is one of the most important concepts because conflict resolution is something that cannot be rushed. Many aspects need to be taken into consideration. The times where I have not given full attention and not listened is when I have made my biggest mistakes. Communication in my personal experience is mainly about responding to peoples words or actions so unless you listen you will have nothing to say.

Week 5 Reading Review #2

When other people talk I do my best at giving my full attention. It is hard for a person to give a hundred percent of your concentration all of the time but I am still trying every day to do it. I like to focus on the main points that they are saying and tend to disregard any of the minor details I find irrelevant. I do not find myself thinking about my own ideas while someone is speaking. I try to listen to the whole story before I do anything such as pass judgment. After speaking to someone I can honestly say that I cannot entirely write down everything someone says. This is so not because I am not listening but because I focus on the main points people bring up. I could write the focus but that is about it. Maybe I could make mistakes of disregarding important information but I try my best to not do such a thing.